Are we there yet?

As a full-time traveler, this is a question I ask myself almost every day. Last year, I probably spent more time in transit than I did in any particular place. I moved to a new city around the world every 2-5 weeks for the ENTIRE year. (Sidenote: I don’t recommend this—but more on that later...)

But then it dawned on me that this something I ask myself constantly in general, too. In this age of influencers, it’s easy for me to constantly feel like I'm not yet where I need to be.

Every other second, I get an ad from someone to teach me how to make $100K in 30/60/90 days. And I think to myself: How come I am still not at 6 figures in my business? All these people online seem to have been able to do it so easily and quickly. And so I decided that even though I’ve helped many people monetize their own online platforms and have reached a few of my own financial goals so far, I don’t want to post/tweet/blog about my business because it’s not there yet.

I used to really enjoy writing. Not because I had a huge following on my blog or because I wanted to make money with it, but simply because I like reflecting out loud. I still do like it, actually. But I barely do it anymore. Somewhere over the last couple of years, I’ve become extremely reluctant to post or share anything online. I’m constantly worried that I’ll make my life seem better than it really is.

Every other second, I see someone posting cool beach photos of them on their laptops with the hashtag #workfromanywhere, and I think to myself How come I’m not as happy as them when I’m working from anywhere? And then I realize that I could post those same things too but it wouldn’t be fully accurate. It would only be telling part of the story. I get in my head and I decide that I don’t want to post/tweet/blog too much about my travel life because it’s not there yet.

More than half of my travels last year were spent in transit and/or in a room somewhere working on my computer. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve seen some amazing places, met some amazing people, and had some amazing experiences — like riding off into the most beautiful Brazilian sunset and watching the Eiffel Tower light up at midnight. But I wouldn’t feel honest posting a bunch of cute travel photos while staying quiet about the mosquito bites, foreign hospital visits, lonely nights, and other parts that are just as intense.

After a couple of years of internal work — therapy, journaling, blocking phone numbers (don’t skip this step!), and muting people online — I realized something. The reason I haven’t blogged in the last few years. And haven't relaunched my Mastermind program in the last few months. And only taken less than 10 dance classes in the last 2 years.

The reason I hold my damn self back from really committing to the things I naturally want to — and used to — do is because of the voice in my head that tells me I’m not there yet.

Once I get there, I can start being vocal and really sharing my experiences. Then I will actually have something to talk about with some success to back it up. But not yet though. I’m not there yet.

People generally seem to share about their struggles after they’ve overcome them. You know what I mean. Someone finally gets that promotion at work. Or that dream client in their business. Or that right number of followers on their podcast. Or that muscle definition for their vacation photos. And they start posting about how “you don’t know what it took for me to get here” and all the struggles and sacrifices that brought them to where they are now. They retrospectively start sharing all the lessons they learned in their journey — and sometimes even charge to teach you what they learned so that you can get there too.

And there’s nothing wrong with that.

But I think there’s value in talking through my journey WHILE I’m still in it. While I’m still not there yet. Still working through overcoming everything holding me back.

Starting today, I’m going [back] to being intentional about reflecting out loud. I no longer want to wait until I feel like I’ve mastered my business, my travels, or my life to start sharing. Partially because I realize I may never feel like I’m there. And partially because it dawned on me that maybe there are people who could benefit from seeing a transparent picture of what it’s like to be on the journey of building a business while traveling full-time and navigating life. Even if I’m not there yet.

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